The intervention

At this point in life, I realize that I haven’t done things quite right. I’ve made many mistakes, continue to make them, and it seems like I’m not learning. Everyone around me reminds me of this daily. Everything was going well until yesterday when some of my friends decided to stage an intervention with me. What they were saying resonated with me, and I knew they were right, but something inside me resisted it. Today, I’ll tell you about that intervention and what it made me reflect on.

I don’t know if it’s a coincidence, but just before this intervention, I had watched two very similar movies in theme, and now, remembering them and considering the intervention, I see it as a sign. The movies are “Beautiful Boy” and “Don’t Worry, He Won’t Get Far on Foot.” They deal with the consequences of being an addict, and how to fight to try to break out of that cycle of self-destruction.

To get out of the hole, you have to do a lot of introspection, as well as delve deep into our soul to understand the cause, the root of all those mistakes and addictions, and then work to accept and move forward. Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) does this very well, working sobriety through 12 steps. It’s simple, follow the 12 steps in order and everything will be fine. Although I’m not an alcoholic (well, I do like my beers, hahaha) and I’m not a drug addict, it seems that I am addicted to making mistakes, so I’ve thought, what if I do the 12 steps? What would happen? Anyone can do it, right?

From what I’ve been researching, these are the 12 steps:

  1. Acceptance: I think I’ve more than surpassed this step, I accept it, acknowledge it, shout it from the rooftops, and I’m not ashamed.
  2. Hope: Shit, I’m going to be stuck here a bit and wont be able to move on to the next without finishing this one. Fuck!
  3. Faith: Isn’t this the same as hope? Or do I have to pray here? Uff, okay, I’ll go to church this Sunday to see what happens. Does it count if I have faith that I won’t be able to handle the 12 steps?
  4. Courage: Damn, another one that’s going to be hard for me a bit, I’m afraid of fear, so this will also be a fucking challenge.
  5. Honesty: I’m halfway there with this one, I’m honest and transparent as you know, but I think I could be a bit more honest. Note taken.
  6. Patience: And here we go again with patience, I´m going to get stuck halfway through the damn steps, fuck again!!
  7. Humility: I’ve surpassed this one, but it’s going to be hard to get to this point.
  8. Willingness: Shit, it seems like the difficult ones are at the beginning, if you overcome those, the rest is a piece of cake.
  9. Brotherly love: Same shit, oh my god, if I get to step 7, the rest is a piece of cake. I love everyone. (Well, okay, maybe I need to work on this one a little).
  10. Integrity: I have too much of this, I think half of my problems come from this, I want to maintain my integrity so much that in the end, I make the wrong decisions.
  11. Self-discipline: Okay, I’m halfway there with this too, it depends on my mood, I either give it my all or not, so this also needs work.
  12. Service: If I get to this point, this is the easiest for me and also one of the reasons why we’re here. Many times I give more to others than to myself, and that’s where the bad decisions come from, how ironic that the last step is actually the first.

Well, then, who wants to be my sponsor?