When you least expect it

What an adventure mine has been, well, what an adventure yours and everyone’s. We’re constantly going back and forth, up and down, and everything in between. I think, at 55 going on 56, I still find myself surprised by life, by circumstances, and by the day-to-day. Just when I think I have everything figured out, BOOM! the universe slaps me in the face, laughs at me, and shows me another way of seeing things. Honestly, whether it’s good or bad, I love this circus we live in. Today, I share with you another chapter of my amusing life.

I’m not sure if we’re already onto another chapter or another season; I lose track of time a bit. But I want to tell you that step by step (I’ve learned not to say little by little because they say that’s negative, hahaha!) I’m rediscovering my true essence. I’m uncovering who I am, who I’ve always been but tried to hide because of what others might say. There have been times when I didn’t care what people thought of me, but then comes a moment when I feel ashamed and retract, becoming once again the Nuria everyone wants me to be. So I go back and forth, fighting with myself, with the being inside me that wants to come out, and I try to stop it, so as not to offend anyone (the Libra in me that wants to please everyone).

Fuck, Nuria, girl, focus and tell us what you have to say! I’m going, I’m going! I always have to warm you up a bit before diving into the matter at hand. These last 9 months, fuck that, now that I think about it, this time has been like a bad pregnancy where you’re throwing up all the time, crying for no reason, everything hurts, you gain too much weight, you pee every 5 minutes, you can’t sleep well, your clothes don’t fit, you can’t see your feet! Hahahaha! Well, it’s been something like that (very similar in many details), and finally, I’ve given birth. I’ve gestated something inside me that has cost me a huge effort. Giving birth has been the most difficult thing right up until the end, pushing, pushing, knowing that there was no other option, that if I didn’t push, even if it hurt, I and what was about to be born were in danger.

And here we are, with my new being in hand, my new self, my new life, reborn, so to speak, with a new vision. It’s been a long road, one of the longest in my life, and it coincides not only in the last 9 months, but also in the last 9 years, as I told you about this in my post:

The culmination of the end of the cycle of my year 9 in numerology.

In short, I think the cycle has finally ended, and so it is, 2024 is my year 1. That is, I start a new cycle and I’m convinced that this is going to be one of the best. I leave behind the ‘poor me,’ everything happens to me, I have bad luck, why me?… All that has been buried in the last cycle and now I’ve given birth to a new one, full of positivity, light, and many new adventures. In recent years, I’ve gotten rid of many physical and mental things, but more importantly, of people who didn’t contribute anything positive to me. People who were there during my last cycle, but now I leave behind to continue on their path, because I’m clear that they won’t be on mine. I feel liberated, as if I’ve taken a thousand pounds off my shoulders, renewed and full of hope and faith. I stay with all those people and things that have truly helped me without judging, but still gave me support and advice when I needed it and they saw that it was necessary.

And all this hasn’t come for free or without effort. These last months and years I’ve worked a lot on my being, on my inner self. I’ve fought with myself thousands of times, I’ve made mistakes, I’ve gotten angry, I’ve cried more than usual, I’ve been frustrated, and I’ve repeated the same nonsense over and over again. But at the same time, I’ve been improving, reflecting, getting stronger mentally, challenging myself, stepping out of my comfort zone, looking for other alternatives, asking questions, studying, informing myself, educating myself, and doing all this from the heart, from kindness and all the good things I had inside me. I’ve returned to praying at my altar, to my goddesses, to creating affirmations, manifestations, meditating. I have to tell you that my rituals of repeating mantras, reading my affirmations out loud, looking at them and visualizing my vision board, writing why I was grateful every morning, and writing every single day what kind of life I wanted, what things I wanted to happen, have come true. The guide I created (available on Amazon, hahaha!) has helped me achieve all this.

My Affirmations and Manifestation Journal

Today marks the beginning of my new adventure in every sense. One of them is my new job, which after 9 long months and several offers, some very good ones but I rejected them because in my heart I knew there was something better, I finally have the job I had dreamed of. I’m doing something I like, something I’m good at, in a sector I believe in and support, in a company that considers the employee the most important thing, that understands my situation with my mother and gives me all the flexibility in the world. Besides, I can also work with a dear friend who is more than a good person, he is an admirable person. My kids are also on the right path now and I’m 100% sure that the rest of the problems I have to figure out will be solved in the way I want because, ladies and gentleman positivity and the manifestation of what you want, even if it’s hard and takes time, arrives, it always arrives…

Join me on this new journey…