I’m an addict, I admit it. I wish there were some kind of AA for people addicted to writing nonstop and spilling all their little shit stories out into the world. Or rather, onto paper, or a WordPress blog, or Word, or whatever the hell those fucking authors use to write.

I’ve said it a thousand times: I don’t consider myself an author, a writer, or a novelist. I’m just a regular woman with a whole lot of shit in her head that she needs to spit out day after day, or she’ll drown in words, feelings, thoughts, and truths and lies hidden somewhere in the great beyond.

I’ve gone way too long without writing every day, and I think it’s really taken a toll on me. Writing has always been my own personal therapy, just me dealing with myself, and it’s worked pretty well so far. So here I am again, letting it all out, because it’s about damn time I cleared some of the rubble out of this head of mine.

I’m 58 years old. I’ve lived in two countries, raised two kids, danced, had tons of adventures, traveled, made friends, lost friends, done things I’m proud of, done things I regret, been pretty, been skinny, gained weight, been happy, been sad, surprised people, been surprised, hit rock bottom, reached incredible heights, had money, been completely broke, seen things I probably shouldn’t have seen, dressed fashionably, prayed, made wishes, moved dozens of times…

I’ve broken hearts, had my heart broken, worked, quit jobs, been promoted, been fired, gotten married, gotten divorced, loved, hated, won, lost, written books, returned to acting, lost myself, found myself, and then lost myself all over again…

And here I am, at this point in the movie, wondering what the hell I want to do with the rest of my life.

Looking back at all the little shit I’ve done (and I’m sure I’ve left out thousands of things, which, knowing me, I’ll come back days, weeks, or even months later to add because I suddenly remembered something), I think: But Nuria, you’ve done practically everything! What else could you possibly want to do?

Well, Nuria wants to do a whole lot more.

Nuria thinks she’s only just getting started.

That these past 58 years have basically been an internship on a construction site that’s finally getting up and running. And now I need to take everything I’ve learned and use it to build the masterpiece of my life in this universe.

I just hope someone gives me a hard hat, a safety vest, and some overalls…

I hope you’ll join me on this new adventure. I know a lot of you don’t read much anymore, especially with this new era of videos, AI, and all that other fucking nonsense. Sitting down to actually read words seems almost boring these days. But as I always say, I’m doing this for myself, so…

Nuria, are you ready?

It’s you and me, as always, girl. Just the two of us, together in this. How exciting!

I’m really looking forward to getting started, but I understand there are quite a few steps involved. I’ll probably need to have a meeting with the construction manager (who the fuck is that going to be?) so they can tell me where to begin…

Oh shit, what if I’M the construction manager???

Of course I am.

FUCK!

I’m going to have to start studying because I don’t know a damn thing about construction. Thank goodness my guy is pretty handy. I’m sure he’ll help me build and plan everything.

Although one thing is absolutely clear: I’m the architect here. Because you know how it goes. Other people start telling you where to put the walls, and before you know it, you’re living in a house you don’t even like.

I think the plot of land is pretty much settled. It is what it is. As for the building materials, well, my body and mind, although a little vintage, are still working perfectly fine, so I think everything is going to turn out just fabulous…

Am I going to have to hire people? Hadn’t thought about that…

Hmm, so many things to think about and plan. Will I need permits? A budget? What if a wall comes crashing down?

Well, it wouldn’t exactly be the first time I’ve had to pick myself up from the rubble. And I’m still here, so I guess I can’t be that bad at it.

Anyway, the important thing is to get started. And today, right here in front of all of you, I’m officially breaking ground on a brand-new reinvention project. I have absolutely no idea where it’s going to take me, but I’m pretty sure it’ll be somewhere super fun.

I’d love for this construction project to become a space I can share with all the people who love me and have always supported me. And I imagine some new characters will join the adventure along the way.

Let’s see who shows up, because knowing my track record, somebody’s bound to arrive without a hard hat and cause a complete disaster.

So, after all this rambling…

LET THE DAMN CONSTRUCTION BEGIN!

In my upcoming posts, I’ll keep you updated on how construction is going and all the obstacles I run into along the way. And hey, if you want to be part of it, I’m always happy to hear your suggestions…

Just remember, advice is welcome, but the boss makes the final decisions. It’s my fucking life, after all!

And now that I think about it… where the hell do you even begin when you’re building a life? With the foundation? By knocking down a few walls? Or do you first have to figure out what kind of house you actually want?

Ughhh… Looks like I’ve already got my work cut out for me tomorrow.

Thanks for reading.